We Enter the Door with Expectations
We all have expectations about almost everything we do. Everything from how we should be treated, to how things should work.
When I was first married I expected my life to mirror what I had experienced with my parents. What a shock to find out that my husband had different expectations. When I had my first preschool class I had expectations and an understanding of how to teach and how children I should interact with children. Another shock, I learned quickly that I was again mistaken. But how are these expectations developed?
What we believe to be the way in which we should conduct ourselves, and the way in which we interact in any circumstance comes from our personal experiences and knowledge passed to us by those we believe are trustworthy; parents, teachers, ministers, coaches, and others.
Our family culture defines our worldview and expectations. When working with children and families we bump up against the family cultures of not only our students, but also parents, co-teachers, and leadership. It can be very confusing.
I was recently at a baseball game. A family behind me had brought their 2-year-old son. When the crowd began booing a certain play, the father began teaching his son how to boo the incident. The little guy had no idea what he was booing but realized that this was what his father expected. Now, his father seemed like a caring parent, and his worldview included booing. This rubbed me wrong.
My family culture did not include this activity. On the contrary, my father would have chastised me. As educators, we need to realize that each family has its own culture, and we need to respect it. (Of course, there are limits)
When I began teaching I was given specific tools about literacy, teaching styles, and safety. For the most part, this information was helpful but did not prepare me for working daily with children. Now we as educators learn about diversity, inclusiveness, and anti-bias. When I work with teachers I find that for some, integrating this information is challenging.
It is difficult for many to set aside their personal truth, and embrace a new way of thinking about early child care. I often hear the admonishment “They are not our children.” This is sometimes difficult, especially for new teachers, to embrace.
My experience in the classroom was defined by my own experiences as a student. The teachers I had, my memories of what we did in class, and how those experiences were understood through my worldview. So, when I began teaching I brought this to my classroom. It defined my teaching style and how I presented information to my students. I had much to learn.
When I teach other educators I see that they have the same struggles. For instance, my understanding of teaching included worksheets, quiet obedient children, and learning objectives based on academics, not development. Over time I learned to do things differently. I learned to be an intentional teacher putting the needs of the children first. When I began to implement sound practices my children were happier, making their parents happier and I was happier. I had to let go and grow.
It is impossible to completely let go of our own personal biases. Take heart, as long as you become aware of what you thought you knew and work towards sound practices it will get better. This does not mean that you were wrong, you just didn’t know. This is a scary idea for many educators. That’s OK.
Learn about best practices for child care. Take classes and read current material. I promise it will make your teaching more productive, and an easier experience for everyone involved.
